|Reason for Loss
||Surrey Advertiser - 6th December 1941: "BULLET THROUGH BRAIN. AIRCRAFTMAN'S SUICIDE ON LEAVE. MORBID ATTITUDE TO LIFE. An obsession which might have been dispelled by a psychologist was said to have been harboured by Aircraftman Harry Allen, aged 34, of 12, Farnham-road, Guildford, who shot himself through the head on Thursday last week, leaving behind at his home a black tin box containing manuscript and typescript telling of his longstanding intention to commit suicide. A finding of "Suicide while the balance of his mind was disturbed" was entered by the borough coroner, Mr. Gilbert H. Bailey, at the inquest at the Guildhall on Saturday. Mrs. Hilda Rideout, a sister, said that Aircraftman Allen, who before joining the Royal Air Force was a painter and decorator, was inclined to be nervous, irritable and morose, though he seemed brighter when he came home on 48 hours' leave on Monday last week. He caught an early train to return to duty on the Wednesday, but was back in Guildford again by 9.30 in the morning, and went to his bedroom and shut the door. He had been accustomed to spend hours typing in a locked room. Mrs. Rideout identified her brother's writing on envelopes and a diary shown to her... The Coroner said that Allen had left documents dating back to 1933, showing that he intended to commit suicide, and he had also written to the coroner "very long reasons" for his conviction that life was not worth living. It was evident that Allen had secret worries which he need not have had if he had consulted a psychologist, who could have assured him that there was nothing in those worries. Some of his writings referred to "continued cursed weariness and lethargy," and a self-consciousness which caused him to "make all manner of queer expressions when among strangers." He wrote of his suicidal intention, and expressed his last directions and wishes, and the Coroner said that, having read Allen's long, sad story, he had no hesitation in saying that for years Allen had been mentally unbalanced. He might have been able to carry on his ordinary work, but he had "a secret gnawing at his vitals," and instead of taking a doctor into his confidence, and being put right by a psychologist, or some such person, he had worried over himself, and ultimately committed suicide. He hoped at one time that being in the Forces would take him out of his depression, but the depression had got hold of him again.